


Choices, Consequences, and Chaos

by Chameleon777



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Ableism, Ableist Language, Bullying, Discrimination, Discussion of Abortion, Fear of Discovery, Intimidation, Mpreg, Other, Racism, Unethical Experimentation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:42:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26308759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chameleon777/pseuds/Chameleon777
Summary: Approximately a month after the end of the Dominion War, Dr. Julian Bashir faces a surprise that creates a snowball effect. Starfleet's reaction to his unexpected situation isn't a happy one and unable to trust that Starfleet wouldn't try to harm him, Bashir goes to Colonel Kira for help. Colonel Kira sends Bashir to a Bajoran health clinic in secrecy so he can verify his discovery and decide how to respond to the grim ultimatum that Starfleet issues him. Bashir ends up needing more medical care than he originally expected and that provides him an opportunity to decide how he wants to handle the situation.Once Dr. Bashir makes a decision about his situation, he is treated to the unexpected intervention of newly elected Legate Elim Garak. Legate Garak exposes Starfleet's hypocrisy through the journalism talents of Jake Sisko and creates a firestorm that ignites social resistance against what Starfleet is trying to make Julian do.
Comments: 16
Kudos: 21





	1. Facing Reality

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: This story was inspired by 'Alone, Together', a multi-part series written by Matt Campbell for the Sid City Social Club. I didn't borrow anything from Matt's series, but the sheer beauty of his work inspired me to make some lovely works of my own including this one.

“Now landing outside of the City of Ilvia,” the computer’s voice filled the air.

A groan escaped the bunk as Dr. Julian Bashir opened his eyes and peered at the empty cockpit area irritably. He had gone to bed not long after the shuttle had left Deep Space Nine, setting up the shuttle to pilot itself to the City of Ilvia and wake him when it landed. He felt like he had gotten no rest at all.

“Computer, what time is it?” Julian asked shakily as he sat up and sighed weakly. “ _Oh_ , my _stomach_ …”

The computer beeped, “The time is 0800 hours,” it replied, completely devoid of emotion.

Reluctantly, Julian crawled off the bunk and grabbed a comb off of the bedside console, running it through his hair only briefly before he put it back. His Starfleet uniform was tucked into a compartment along with the rest of his few personal possessions, including Kukulaka. He had no idea where he was going to go after his visit here, but he knew he couldn’t go back to Deep Space Nine and be safe there.

He was wearing simple boots, loose dark pants, a loose tan, V-neck shirt that resembled a tunic, and a hooded cloak that was meant to keep him warm in the morning cold. Colonel Kira had given it to him when he said that he needed to keep himself from being recognized by anyone he might run into.

Starfleet was VERY angry with him and what they were capable of doing about his little problem if he didn’t follow their orders to handle it himself scared him to death. The thought of it made him feel…

Nausea suddenly filled his body and before he could stop himself, Julian threw up on the floor just beside the cockpit area, “ _Oh_ , this morning sickness is irritating me,” he muttered with a sigh.

A chill enveloped his body, but Julian ignored it as he made sure his identification card and credit chip was in his pocket. As much as he wanted to bring Kukulaka with him, he didn’t intend to stay long enough to need anything that personal. Kukulaka would just have to stay in his luggage for now.

Anger suddenly filled Julian’s heart; the other father should be here with him and they should have been celebrating the pregnancy together, but it wasn’t happening. He was _alone_ with his news, Starfleet was unbelievably infuriated, and he was seeking help from a Bajoran medical clinic out of pure fear.

His exit from the shuttle was a shaky one, as he was weak, tired, nauseous, and irrationally emotional, but Julian managed to step on Bajoran soil with his own two feet. The city was within a walkable distance, but each step felt like a walk to the guillotine to Julian. What would the clinic have to say?

As Julian approached the city limit, passing fields of katterpods that were growing and nearly to the point where they could be harvested, he raised the cloak on the hood and made the hood as deep as possible so he could hide his identity. Colonel Kira would no doubt be forced to tell Starfleet where he was and he _hoped_ that the Bajorans would protect him from any unwelcome visitors.

The city itself was quiet, Julian observed as he made his way down the street. He had chosen this early hour simply because it would be quiet, it would be peaceful, and he could do what he wished quietly.

Grief filled Julian with every step he took, but he kept walking and it took him a long time to follow the directions Colonel Kira had given him. She had gently told him that he had the right to do what he wanted with his situation and to not be afraid to refuse Starfleet orders that didn’t make sense.

It wasn’t long before Julian arrived at the Ilvian Medical Complex. He _hoped_ they could help him.


	2. The First Step

_What was he doing?_ As harsh and as sociopathic as Starfleet wanted him to be in getting on with his orders and forgetting it happened, he couldn’t. He needed _help_ to think it through.

With trembling hands, Julian pressed the buttons on the computer that was on the wall just outside the entrance door. A small sign, written in multiple languages, indicated that he needed to consult the computer before going inside. The computer would direct him accordingly.

“Welcome to the Ilvian Medical Complex on Bajor,” the computer responded. “What is your request? For service in…”

Julian cleared his throat, which had suddenly become dry in the morning air, “I…I’d like to speak to a doctor,” he spoke shakily. “Someone who deals with handling male pregnancies…”

“The walk-in clinic is not available until 1700 hours,” the computer replied in a monotone voice that gave Julian a slight headache. “Appointments can be made…”

Allowing a curse word to escape his chapped, dry lips, Julian hit the computer in deep frustration, “Stupid computer!” he shouted angrily, more angry at himself and his sheer weakness than anything. “I don’t want to make an appointment! It’s urgent!”

“Unable to comply,” the computer replied tonelessly. “Request not recognized.”

His hood fell and a throat cleared, prompting Julian to freeze. Had Starfleet tracked him?

“Can you not do that, please?” a gentle, but firm voice suddenly asked from behind. “The administration doesn’t take kindly to having their computers beaten and broken by irate people who don’t get in for appointments when they want to.”

Another curse word escaped Julian’s lips and tears filled his eyes, “It’s an emergency!” he exclaimed, a tired sigh in his voice because he was simply too aggravated to care about decorum any longer. “I’m _pregnant_ and I don’t know what to do about it!”

Silence filled the air, “You’re a _male_ ,” the same voice replied. “At least you _appear_ male…”

A weepy sigh escaped his lips, “I’m an Augment who got given a few extra parts when my parents had me genetically altered at the age of six,” he replied irritably. “I was able to hide it during the war, but Starfleet…they’re _not_ happy with me right now. They _know_ and they…”

Swallowing hard and fully expecting a Starfleet officer to be behind him, Julian turned to face the voice. What he saw, however, was a Bajoran female sporting brown hair and a medical uniform. Her expression, though professional, was filled with compassion and tenderness.

Guilt filled Julian and he sighed, “Oh, I’m sorry,” he said with a resigned sigh, feeling horrible that he had lashed out at a stranger. “ The commander at Deep Space Nine, Colonel Kira Nerys, recommended this place as somewhere I could go for a proper checkup. I can’t very well do an ultrasound or any of that on myself. I’m sorry…I’m _scared_.”

“I can see you’re scared,” the woman replied gently, her expression kind. “You’re Doctor Bashir, aren’t you? Nerys commed me last night and said you’d be arriving this morning. I’m Doctor Tyla Erin, the Chief Obstetrician here.”

 _She looks younger than me_. Julian thought as he nodded, at a loss for words. _Thank you, Nerys._

“Um, the computer says I need to book an appointment,” Julian stammered nervously, trying desperately to control his emotions. When can I get in for one?”

A smile appeared on Dr. Tyla’s lips, “I’m the head gynecologist here, Doctor Bashir,” she replied gently. I can take patients whenever I choose to. How about now?”

Waves of nausea suddenly assaulted Julian, “I…um…,” he stammered, cringing. “Hold that thought for _just_ a minute. I’m going to be sick again…”

He couldn’t stop himself from hurling into the bushes that were just below the computer. Dr. Tyla’s eyes widened in shock; he appeared to be _very_ ill and unusually distressed.

A weak cough escaped Julian’s lips, “Sorry about the bushes,” he spoke, his voice a whimper as he straightened up again. “My scanner says I’m about a month along, but I cannot do an ultrasound on myself or any of that…”

Pregnancies were supposed to be wonderful things, Dr. Tyla thought as she studied his pale face and the immense sadness in his eyes. He was a Starfleet doctor, she knew, but why was he here? Why had Colonel Kira Nerys sent him to her? Why did he look so helpless and scared?

“As you said, Doctor Bashir, you cannot do an ultrasound on yourself,” Dr. Tyla spoke, sensing she _would_ get the answers from him as long as she treated him with absolute gentleness. “Come along inside with me. We’ll get you registered and I can examine you myself.”

Julian forced his feet forward to follow the doctor inside, but he suddenly felt unusually cool, weak and dizzy as he entered the complex. _What on earth was happening to him?_

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

The Intake Area was quiet and Julian lingered with his increasing feelings of unwellness, huddling in his cloak to try and dissipate the chills rocketing through his body. The dizziness and nausea was only getting worse He was a Starfleet doctor hiding out at a Bajoran health centre and he was scared. He _wasn’t_ feeling good about his orders and he just wasn’t feeling good.

“I…I’m a bit dizzy,” Julian found himself confessing in a shaking voice. “Do you mind if we go slow to the exam room? How far is where we’re…”

A whimper escaped Julian’s lips and he suddenly felt himself fall briefly before a pair of strong arms grabbed a hold of him, “Oh, _Prophets_ ,” Dr. Tyla’s voice breathed anxiously. “Orderly, bring me a hoverchair right away!”

Pure, unadulterated anxiety filled Julian, “Oh, no…that’s really not necessary,” he spoke shakily. “I think the room will stop spinning _soon_.”

Protesting was _pointless_ , Julian quickly realized as he saw a Bajoran orderly appear out of nowhere with a hoverchair. Dr. Tyla quickly helped him sit down in the chair, but Julian felt his overwhelmed body crumple forward. Sitting up straight was absolutely _not_ an option right now.

The chair moved, but Julian remained perfectly still and closed his eyes simply because he was comfortable. He felt so physically and emotionally ill right now and moving would worsen it.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“Doctor Bashir?”

A gentle hand touched his face and Julian groaned, “Oh, Gods, I just want to _sleep_ ,” he moaned.

“Doctor Bashir, are you there?” the gentle voice repeated. “I can see you breathing, but…”

Julian sighed and allowed his eyes to open, “Mhm,” he replied in a weak voice, his body unbearably cold with fatigue and fear. “I’m sorry I’m such a mess.”

“I’ve seen worse,” Dr. Tyla’s voice responded gently. “ We’re just going to go into this room right here and I’ll give you a proper examination. When we get in there, I’m gonna need you to unfold yourself…”

The hoverchair moved again as Julian whimpered. However, Dr. Tyla was very patient and simply waited for Julian to be ready. She had made herself unavailable for the day because it was plain as day that Dr. Julian Bashir was nothing more than a shell of fear and sickness at the moment. Colonel Kira had told her things about why he was coming to Bajor, but Dr. Tyla wanted to hear them from Julian himself. Such discussion, though, would take time and patience was required.


	3. Exposure

It took nearly half an hour of sitting as a crumpled mess before Julian was able to straighten his body up. He took his time crawling from the chair to the bed, letting out a very weak sigh as he finally settled himself on the biobed. His hands immediately went to his flat abdomen as if he were trying to protect it from being hurt or taken. _What on earth was happening to him?_

Dr. Tyla waited until he appeared settled before walking over to the bed, “ _Well_ , you don’t seem to need help getting up on the bed,” she spoke jovially, trying to lighten the mood of sadness that was filling the room. “I’m going to give you a line of fluids in your hand before I start the exam because I can already tell you’re dehydrated.”

Julian winced as he felt a poke in his hand, but he didn’t whine. He was so tired and didn’t have the energy to protest. A thought suddenly came to mind, however; a very _important_ thought.

“Before you start, there’s _something_ you should know…about the other father,” Julian spoke in a weak voice, closing his eyes because his energy level was dropping horribly fast.

Ever the professional, Dr. Tyla pressed a few buttons on the biobed console, activating it, “Computer, initiate diagnostic scan and an ultrasound scan,” she said in a calm voice, sensing that he was about to reveal the reason for his distress. “Yes, Doctor Bashir? What is it?”

“Diagnostic and ultrasound scans initialized,” the computer responded.

At that moment, the floodgates broke and Julian found himself crying openly, “He’s _Cardassian_ ,” he confessed, sorrow in his voice. “I think…I’m not sure…he’s a Legate on Cardassia Prime. Or that’s what he said he was going to be in the letter he sent to Nerys on Deep Space Nine last month. He’s a _very good_ liar, so he might just be saying that whilst doing something completely different.”

 _A Cardassian was the other father?_ Dr. Tyla thought as she focused on the scan. _So what?_ She didn’t feed into the animosity that Cardassians and Bajorans had for each other. She hadn’t since the war ended and found herself rightly confused by Julian’s intense fear and shame.

A blip suddenly appeared on the ultrasound scan, “Oh, _there’s_ the heartbeat,” Dr. Tyla spoke in a kind voice, frowning when Julian didn’t say a word or even showed any reaction besides staring listlessly at the ceiling. “Your baby looks very healthy, Doctor, but your personal body temperature’s a little low and so I’m going to get you a couple of blankets.”

Julian found that he had no words as he was covered in warm blankets. He felt intense grief.

“The old crew of Deep Space Nine and I had a goodbye party for everyone who was going to be moving on from the station shortly after the treaty was signed,” Julian found himself saying softly as he recounted the story. “A Cardassian tailor who lived on the station and I ended up drinking together to the point where we ended up…well…intimate. The next morning, he left…and he left me with this souvenir.”

Dr. Tyla nodded, “Would you like to hear your baby’s heartbeat, Doctor Bashir?” she asked softly.

An expression of confusion filled Julian’s pale face, “ You’re _Bajoran,”_ he replied softly. “I…I just told you I’m pregnant with a _Cardassian’s_ baby. Doesn’t the idea disgust you?”

Dr. Tyla scoffed, the entire idea of allowing racism to cloud her dedication to her doctor’s oath and to her obviously frightened patient seeming ridiculous, “And the Cardassians lost much in the war,” she replied, having served in the war herself. “This baby will be a _blessing_ for you and the Cardassian father…if you choose to even keep it and to tell him about it.”

Julian exhaled softly, suddenly feeling tired, “That’s the choice now, isn’t it?” he replied, deciding that he had played enough games with his purpose there. “When I realized who the father might be, I talked with Colonel Kira about it and she went _ballistic_ …called me and Elim irresponsible…”

 _Why did that name sound familiar?_ Dr. Tyla wondered, “Elim?” she asked gently.

“Oh _Gods_ , now I’ve done it,” Julian breathed anxiously, mentally kicking himself as he spoke. “Elim Garak was the Cardassian tailor…”

 _The one who had helped capture the Founder and end the war?!_ Dr. Tyla thought, deepl intrigued as she looked at Julian patiently, “You mean that little shadow that helped end the war?” she replied, wanting to confirm. “ _That_ Elim Garak?!”

“In his letter to Colonel Kira, Garak said he was made a Legate for his efforts during the Dominion War and it was an offer he _couldn’t_ refuse…or so he said,” Julian explained softly.

A thought suddenly occurred to Dr. Tyla that could explain Julian’s sadness, “Surely…” she began in a concerned voice, shocked as Julian continued weeping. “He _doesn’t_ know about the baby, _does_ he?”

“ _No_ …” Julian whimpered. “I _don’t_ want to disrupt his life with this and my other problems.”

 _And the other shoe just dropped._ Dr. Tyla realized worriedly. She _knew_ that Bashir was hiding something else. He _had_ to be. Why _was_ he here on Bajor instead of at a Federation clinic?

“I _assumed_ there were other problems that you weren’t mentioning,” Dr. Tyla spoke in a quiet, gentle voice as she watched Julian weep helplessly. “Why else would you come to a _Bajoran_ hospital instead of seeking out a Federation doctor?”

Julian’s heart felt unbelievably heavy, but he spoke anyway, “I told Starfleet about the pregnancy when I caught wind of it and they want me to terminate it because they think having the baby of a former Obsidian Order spy is some sort of espionage!” he replied in an angry, tearful voice, the volume of it slightly elevated. “It’s _just_ a baby! So what if it’s…?!”

Grief filled Julian as he continued to cry, “I can go over _all_ the options with you, Doctor,” Dr. Tyla spoke, sensing that she had to say it even if it caused hurt. “Don’t worry.”

“Starfleet gave me an ultimatum,” Julian spoke, his voice filled with grief as he finally looked at her through eyes that were red from crying. “Either terminate the pregnancy within 48 hours and show evidence that it’s been done or they’ll dishonorably discharge me.”

 _He doesn’t want to do it, but he’s not wanting to piss Starfleet off._ Dr. Tyla realized as she watched a great expression of grief fill Dr. Bashir’s face. She finally let out a gentle sigh.

“Is that the _only_ choice Starfleet gave you?” Dr. Tyla asked in a concerned voice, quietly _incensed_ that Starfleet preached tolerance and equality publicly, but were privately sociopathic about the affairs of one of its own. “Termination? They wouldn’t let you have the baby and give it up for adoption to someone who isn’t in Starfleet?”

A sniffle filled the air and Julian sighed, “No,” he replied in a weak voice, drained from the confession. “They think an Augment having a half-Cardassian child is a risk to the Federation’s safety and security. I’m _already_ at the top floor of the glass elevator in Starfleet anyway.”

“The top floor of the glass elevator?” Dr. Tyla asked in a confused voice, frowning.

Julian nodded, exhaustion slowly claiming his ability to be awake. “Being Chief Medical Officer at Deep Space Nine is the best posting I’ll ever be able to get because of my _illegal_ status,” he explained, recalling what penalties Starfleet had handed him after Sisko’s disappearance because they wondered if the Emissary thing was a joke and if Bashir himself had disposed of the Captain in a _despotic_ fit. “It will take _years_ before I’m even _eligible_ for a promotion…if…”

An idea suddenly occurred to Dr. Tyla; what Julian needed was more _time_ and opportunity to think things through. The medical data indicated that admission was necessary and she had the authority to admit him, make sure he was safe, and make sure the baby was well. Even Starfleet couldn’t dispute medical science, and if they tried to, she’d make sure they regretted it.

“Look, Doctor Bashir, you need a little _more_ care than a simple exam,” Dr. Tyla spoke in a gentle, but official voice. “I’m going to admit you to my floor. I think it necessary.”

Julian trembled, “Starfleet’s going to find out that I didn’t do it…I don’t want to, but…” the protests dying in his throat as quickly as they came out of his mouth. “Starfleet…oh _Gods_.”

“Starfleet has _no_ authority here,” Dr. Tyla explained firmly, watching as Julian listened intently. “They haven’t had any since the war ended and Bajor refused to join the Federation. The Kai has indicated that we as a people need more time before making such an important decision and my people happen to agree.”

Julian sighed, but didn’t say anything, “Low body temperature and dehydration can be fairly serious, you know,” Dr. Tyla continued, sensing that he was going to fall asleep at any moment simply because he looked absolutely spent. “It’s _protocol_ to admit medically unstable people for observation…”

Nodding, Julian allowed himself a moment to relax. _He had more time that he really needed._

“So I suppose it’s all right to nap now?” Julian spoke weakly as he felt his eyes droop. “I find myself very tired. Sharing about Garak and Starfleet and everything…I’m _exhausted_.”

Dr. Tyla nodded, “By all means, nap,” she replied soothingly. “I’ll take care of getting you admitted and in a room. When you wake up, you’ll probably be in a room upstairs.”

A weak sigh escaped Julian’s lips as he allowed his eyes to fall shut and his stressed, fatigued body to relax for the first time in days. Dr. Tyla watched him briefly before going over to the computer terminal in the exam room to get her patient admitted, unwilling to leave him alone.


	4. The First Decision

“Incoming message,” a voice filled the room.

A tranquil quiet is the first thing that greeted Julian as he woke. The second was the sight of the room.

He had obviously been moved while asleep, Julian reasoned, as he took in the dresser/sink he was facing that had a deactivated newsfeed transmitter above it. The walls were a light blue and the air was warm, which was comforting. A small computer terminal was within reach of the bed and as Julian weakly lifted his arm to touch it, he caught sight of a blue sleeve and a hospital bracelet. He couldn’t help but look.

 _BASHIR, JULIAN SUBATOI – OBSTETRICS WARD – ILVIAN MEDICAL COMPLEX_ was scrawled on the bracelet and a dripfeed was embedded in his hand, held securely in place by medical tape.

“Incoming message,” a voice filled the room.

Julian sighed as he again closed his eyes to give himself another moment, “Computer, transmit the message to the computer beside the bed,” he replied in a weak, but clear voice.

“Message transmitted,” the computer replied. “Message is from Deep Space Nine. Marked Urgent.”

Scoffing escaped Julian’s lips as he opened his eyes and forced himself to look at the bedside computer. His hand shook as he pressed a button, allowing the message to go through.

“Display message,” Julian said, dropping his hand to the bed.

_Julian,_

_Starfleet’s been sending me messages every hour, demanding an update on what you intend on doing about your pregnancy. I’d really like for you to at least let me know what’s going on so I can keep Starfleet off your back. You’ve been gone since 0300 this morning. I’m worried._

_Colonel Kira, Commanding Officer of Deep Space Nine_

Julian’s eyes narrowed in anger; why couldn’t Starfleet leave him alone? Why did they have to be so utterly demanding about the situation? Couldn’t they _see_ that their sociopathic insistence that he terminate an innocent life for petty reasons was hurting him? He sighed sadly.

“Computer, put a temporary block on messages sent from Deep Space Nine to this room,” Julian found himself saying in a tone that indicated he was about _done_ with Starfleet.

The computer beeped in response, “Message block initiated,” it replied. “No new messages from Deep Space Nine will be accepted from this point forward.”

Now that he was awake, Julian realized that he needed something to do that didn’t involve leaving the bed because he was feeling less than sociable and very physically weak. Reading was an option. He wondered if he could order a book from the hospital library for himself.

“Computer, does the hospital library have _The Never-Ending Sacrifice_ on file?” Julian asked, unable to help but think of how much the book reminded him of Garak and how much better the mere reminder, even though it was a dull book, would make him feel.

The computer beeped, “Book is available through requesting the hospital library services,” it said.

“Computer, please request that the hospital library services deliver a copy of _The Never-Ending Sacrifice_ to my room as soon as possible,” Julian replied softly, knowing that the book would at least keep him occupied while in the hospital if nothing else. “Can I also request some juice?”

Again, the computer beeped, “Requests have been filed with the hospital’s library and dietary services,” it responded.

A wave of fatigue hit Julian ever so suddenly and he knew without a doubt that it was time to get some more rest, “Computer, let me know when those arrive,” he spoke in a tired voice as he closed his eyes to rest yet again. “I’m going back to sleep.”

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“Doctor Bashir?”

Julian knew the voice. He knew someone safe was in the room, but he didn’t want to wake up.

“Doctor Bashir?”

A tissue suddenly touched his face and he opened his eyes just in time to see Dr. Tyla gently drying his tears with a tissue with one hand. In her other hand was a tray that contained what looked like a novel, a bowl of soup, and a tall glass of juice. Julian sighed softly.

Julian exhaled and he used the bed controls to adjust the bed so he could sit up a little higher without overexerting himself, prompting Dr. Tyla to move back a bit, “Are those my requests?” he asked in a shaky voice, a sigh in his tone. “I…I didn’t request any food…”

An expression of pure kindness and compassion stared back at him, “I caught your request on my computer and modified it using my medical override,” she explained firmly. “You need to _eat_.”

“As much as I _need_ to eat, I’m not hungry,” Julian admitted. “I’ve got absolutely _no_ appetite.”

Dr. Tyla paused, seemingly unsurprised by Julian’s state of mind given the notification that had come up on her patient files just a bit ago, “Would this have anything to do with the fact that you put a block on messages from Deep Space Nine to your room earlier?” she asked softly.

Julian nodded, but didn’t speak, “Deep Space Nine contacted the hospital directly when they became aware of it and the hospital simply said you were entitled to your privacy,” she stated.

“The message was from Colonel Kira,” Julian admitted, finding his words. “She told me that Starfleet was pressing her for an answer about my health. She had to _legally_ tell them I was coming here and they _demanded_ that I get on with…”

Swallowing hard, Julian exhaled weakly, “And what do _you_ want to do?” Dr. Tyla asked in a concerned voice, frowning. “This baby is _not_ the Federation’s. It’s _yours_.”

The sight of the novel on the tray triggered something in Julian, “Back when I was on Deep Space Nine, Garak had me read _The Never-Ending Sacrifice_ as part of a literary exchange we participated in over lunches together,” he explained in a quiet, tired voice. “I originally thought the novel rather dull and repetitive, but I’ve come to realize that my life’s become the same way since the war ended.”

Deeply intrigued at what her patient was getting at, Dr. Tyla set up the tray on the bedside table and sat down on the bedside stool, sensing that Bashir would like company. Julian felt a sense of relief that she had chosen to stay rather than dump the tray and leave him to suffer.

“In the book, generations of families decided things together and a unified sense of duty is what truly made them who they were,” Julian explained softly, his expression solemn as he gazed at his doctor. “This child may be in _my_ body, but it’s not _just_ mine.”

Quickly catching on to what Julian was implying, Dr. Tyla nodded, “You want to include the other parent in the decision?” she guessed softly, her expression gentle and curious.

“I don’t know if I want to, but I think I _should_ ,” Julian admitted in a quiet voice, a sense of calm enveloping him as he spoke. “It’s Garak’s child just as much as it is mine.”

For the first time since arriving on Bajor, Julian looked completely at peace and the sight warmed Dr. Tyla’s heart considerably, “Do you know how to get in touch with Legate Garak on Cardassia?” she asked in a concerned, gentle voice. “If not, I can use my authority as head of a department to make the call to Cardassia for you and see if he _is_ reachable.”

“I’d appreciate any help I can get in trying to contact Garak,” Julian replied softly even though he knew it would be next to impossible to find Garak. “I’m tired.”

Dr. Tyla nodded and set the tray up so Julian could eat if he wished, “I may keep you for several days just to monitor you and your little one,” she replied, knowing it was not only for his health, but to protect him from the domineering spirit of the Federation as long as possible. “Would that be all right? I’m not sure yet if you’re a high risk pregnancy or not, but I’d like to find out.”

“I trust your judgment,” Julian replied softly as his gaze went to the tray of food and suddenly felt like he could eat. “I think…I think I can even _try_ eating tonight.”

Dr. Tyla nodded, “Do you want me to stay while you _try_ to eat?” she asked gently.

As much as Julian craved company, his desire to inform Garak of the situation before the Federation came looking for his disobedient self outweighed that, “Um, would it bother you if I asked you to see how fast you could get in touch with Cardassia?” he asked with a sigh. “Since I’ve blocked messages from Deep Space Nine, it will most likely be a short matter of time before someone from there or from the Federation come _looking_ …”

“I can assure you, Doctor Bashir, this hospital is _more_ than equipped to protect patients who feel like they might be in danger….including yourself and your unborn child,” Dr. Tyla replied in a firm voice, knowing full well _why_ Julian wanted Cardassia contacted sooner than later.

Julian nodded, “ _Still_ , could you humor me and reach out to Cardassia sooner than later?” he asked in a quiet, pleading voice, his expression nervous.

“ _Only_ if you humor me and eat your meal in front of me right now,” Dr. Tyla replied gently.

Bashir nodded and silently engaged in eating the soup slowly. Dr. Tyla smiled encouragingly at her patient before going over to the computer, sitting, and prepping a message to be sent to Cardassia. She smiled when she finds that Elim Garak was indeed a Legate on Cardassia Prime, a respected Legate who was currently located in a safe area of the decimated planet.

“Doctor Bashir, I’ve determined that Elim Garak is who he claimed,” Dr. Tyla replied softly.

Julian’s heart warmed, as he was so relieved that Garak hadn’t lied to Colonel Kira and that he had made good of himself after the war despite Cardassia being in ruins, “Can you please tell him that I’m currently a patient at the Ilvian Medical Complex on Bajor and I’d like him to contact me at his earliest convenience?” he asked softly. “I don’t _want_ to tell him _why_ just yet. Garak always _did_ enjoy a mystery and I’d rather leave him wondering.”

“Of course,” Dr. Tyla replied, smirking and sighing as she quickly typed what Julian had asked because she knew he didn’t have the strength to do more than what he was currently doing.” “Message is written as you requested. I can send it securely so that _nobody_ can intercept, modify, or even know that you’re trying to contact Legate Garak.”

The food and drink were gone quickly and Julian again found himself tired, “That’s reassuring,” he replied softly, yawning through his words. “I’m sorry…eating has made me quite tired.”

Dr. Tyla stood and walked over to the bed, “Then it’s time you get some rest,” she replied in a patient voice, offering him a smile. “It’s about to be shift change and I’m going home for the night, but I’ll arrange for an overnight Security detail and visitor restriction so you can feel safe enough to get a good rest. I’ll also make sure you get fed again in a few hours. You’ve got to keep your strength up after all.”

Nodding, Julian sighed, “Thank you,” he spoke softly as he plucked the novel off of the tray before laying down and beginning to delve into it, hoping it would give him reassurance.

“Have a good night, Doctor Bashir,” Dr. Tyla spoke kindly. “I’ll see you in the morning, all right?”

Once Dr. Tyla was gone, it didn’t take Julian long to fall asleep clutching the novel to his chest.


	5. Investigative Journalism

**Cardassia Prime**

Another workday was done and Legate Elim Garak was tired, but feeling fulfilled as he stepped into the decent-sized, single floor abode that he had been granted. It had belonged to Cardassians who had not survived and the government insisted on the Legates being kept comfy so they could better serve those around them. It wasn’t the house he and Mila had shared long ago, but it was enough.

Everyone who was able to work had been pitching in from the many homeless and orphan children that lived off the streets to government officials. The Detapa Council and military were in charge of dividing the work, arranging any aid that came in, and also using their skills to see to the needs of the people.

Besides serving as a Legate, a reward for his role in helping end the war that he had reluctantly accepted, Garak had also put his tailor skills to use. He mended people’s clothes, art tapestries that had suffered minor damage but were still salvageable, and helped assemble tarps and tents where people could sleep and medics could work safely. He also oversaw the Planetary Gardening Project, a project where the planet collected seeds of both food and flowers and made gardens to foster self-reliance.

Even in the midst of such mess, Cardassia was still surviving. Elim felt like it would take a long time for the planet to recover to a state of self-reliance, but it would happen. For the moment, however, some red leaf tea and a book would suffice until he found the desire to rest. Mercifully, red leaf was one of the crops that _hadn’t_ been destroyed in the war and everyone enjoyed the benefits of it.

“ _Incoming message from Ilvian Medical Complex on Bajor_ ,” the computer suddenly chirped as Garak made his way to his kitchen for some tea. “ _Incoming message from Ilvian Medical Complex on Bajor.”_

Garak suddenly stopped short and immediately made his way over to the computer that sat on the coffee table he had inherited with the house, “Computer, display message,” he ordered briskly.

_Dear Legate Elim Garak of Cardassia,_

_My name is Dr. Tyla Erin and I have been authorized to inform you that Dr. Julian Subatoi Bashir is currently a patient at the Ilvian Medical Complex on Bajor and he would like you to contact him at your earliest convenience. You may use this channel to contact him and I will see he gets your message._

_Sincerely,_

_Dr. Tyla Erin_

Garak’s eyes narrowed in confusion. Why would Julian want _him_ , of all people he could contact, to know that he was in a Bajoran hospital? Why wouldn’t Julian contact the Siskos, people who were already there? Kasidy and Jake divided their time between Deep Space Nine and the land in Kendra Province where Captain Sisko had been building a house before his disappearance. Maybe they already knew.

“Computer, access the number of the Sisko residence in Kendra Province on Bajor that I have saved in my personal data,” Garak spoke in a concerned voice. “I want to talk to Kasidy or Jake Sisko.”

The computer beeped, “ _Attempting to contact Kasidy or Jake Sisko in Kendra Province on Bajor_ ,” it replied in a toneless voice. “ _Sending request to communicate to the Sisko residence on Bajor_.”

A moment passed and suddenly, Jake’s face appeared on the screen, “Ah, greetings,” Garak spoke in a business-like voice as he faced Jake. “I was wondering, young Mister Sisko, if you could tell me why I got a message from a Bajoran doctor saying that Doctor Bashir is a patient at the Ilvian Medical Complex?”

Jake’s eyes widened in surprise, “ _Julian’s in a Bajoran hospital_?” he replied in a shocked voice.

Garak sighed, “You mean to tell me you know _nothing_ about this?” he replied, deeply exasperated.

“ _Um, no, I’m spending the night at the house because I’m working on a novel about my father_ ,” Jake replied in a confused voice, frowning. “ _Let me see if I can somehow access….Wait a minute_.”

Garak frowned as Jake sighed, “ _I looked him up on the public database and it says ‘Information and Visitation Restricted by Patient Request’_ ,” Jake explained worriedly. “ _That seems odd…doesn’t it_?”

“It means, young Mister Sisko, that Julian is obviously in deep enough trouble that he wants to cover his tracks,” Garak stated in a matter-of-fact voice, suddenly feeling wide awake. “Do you think you can meet me at the City of Ilvia tomorrow morning? And I’d like you to do some more research for me…”

Jake nodded, “ _As the son of the Emissary, I can access certain information that others can’t and I’m probably one of the few that Colonel Kira will confide in_ ,” he replied. _“I’ll see you tomorrow, Garak_.”

The call ended and Garak sighed, pausing for only a moment before moving into his bedroom to get a suitcase and some clothes together. Something was _definitely_ wrong and as a Legate, he would be able to get easy access to transportation that could get him to Bajor by the wee hours of the morning. Julian Bashir was _very_ dear to him and he needed answers as to _why_ the very dear man was being secretive.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

It was interesting what credits, threats, and the mention of Emissary Benjamin Sisko could get him, Garak thought as he gathered his things in preparation for landing. It hadn’t been easy to find a shuttle to Bajor as he had originally thought, but he had used his connections to get to the planet and intended to stay there until he found out what was going on. He would sleep on the _street_ if he had to just to get some answers.

He was the sole passenger, as not many Cardassians wanted to travel to Bajor at all, but the solitude suited Garak just fine. Sewing projects kept him busy the entire ride, projects that he only put away when he saw the shuttle was landing. The pilot hadn’t spoke one word to him, but that was fine.

Once the shuttle had landed and the ramp lowered, Garak murmured his thanks before stepping out on to Bajoran soil with his suitcase in hand. It was irritatingly cool out, as it was quite early, but Garak didn’t care about that; he only cared about finding Julian and getting the answers to his mysterious illness.

The shuttle took off quicker than it had landed and Garak felt a sense of relief at finally being on Bajor.

“Garak!”

Garak turned and was pleased to see Jake coming out of the city with a PADD in hand, his expression such that Garak knew the young man had answers for him, “Do you know how cramped that shuttle was?” Garak sniffed indignantly, glaring at Jake. “At least it was only five lightyears!”

Jake nodded as they came face to face, “Legate Garak, I’ve been doing research on Julian’s situation since you contacted me yesterday from Cardassia Prime,” he explained in a concerned, anxious voice. “He’s not receiving visitors and he’s blocked all transmissions from both Earth and Deep Space Nine. I also reached out to Colonel Kira and she shared some things…”

Garak’s eyes narrowed, “ _Situation_?” he asked suspiciously. “I want to know _why_ I was sent a message from a Bajoran hospital saying that he was a patient there. Now you’re telling me there’s something _bigger_ at play?”

“You said you received the message from a Doctor Tyla Erin of the Ilvian Medical Complex, right?” Jake replied in an anxious voice, his expression one of wonder. “Doctor Tyla is the Chief Obstetrician at the complex and Julian’s doctor. She’s the one who admitted him to the hospital!”

 _If Julian is under the care of an obstetrician, that must means he’s…that’s impossible._ Garak mused, his eyes wide with surprise and confusion, “Impossible,” he breathed softly, his expression one of disbelief. “That…Julian’s a man, isn’t he? Human males cannot…!”

“Augments might be different, Legate,” Jake interrupted nervously. “ There’s more, unfortunately.”

 _Julian always had to make things complicated_ , Garak thought to himself, “Of course there is,” he replied in an annoyed voice. “Let me guess; he’s having _twins_.”

A sad expression suddenly appeared on Jake’s face, one that made Garak feel uneasy, “No, Legate, I wish that were all,” Jake replied in a somber, quiet, almost disgusted voice. “Starfleet found out about the pregnancy and they’re trying to order him to abort the baby. Colonel Kira told me that and it’s _probably_ why Julian’s been blocking messages. He doesn’t want to do it.”

Never in his life, not even when he had lost the ability to use his implant, had Garak felt so angry as when those words left Jake’s mouth. _Starfleet was ordering Julian to abort a part-Cardassian child despite the fact that millions of Cardassians had died in the war?! Why would Starfleet do that?!_

Jake sighs, but he didn’t say anything because he knew just by looking that Garak was _furious_ and he had a full right to be, “You’re a journalist, Jake,” Garak finally spoke after several minutes of silent rage. “I want you to help Julian in the capacity of a journalist.”

Raising an eyebrow, Jake said nothing, “I want you to take what you’ve learned about this whole situation and write an expose on what Starfleet is trying to force Julian to do,” Garak spoke in a bitter voice, spitting the words. “Share that Starfleet is forcing him to terminate a pregnancy simply because the other parent involved is Cardassian and they have _concerns_. Share that it would be yet another loss for Cardassia if this pregnancy is not allowed to remain as it is. Expose the Federation and its _bigotry_.”

“Should I ask Julian first?” Jake asked worriedly as Garak exhaled. “What about your reputation?!”

A quiet scoff escaped Garak’s lips as he glared at Jake, “If I do not protect a half-Cardassian child from being murdered by the Federation, my reputation won’t be worth anything,” he replied in a firm, unwavering voice. “I will make _sure_ you are well paid if you do this for _us_.”

“I’ll get it done,” Jake promised, desperate to help his friends. “Do you want me to tell you when it is going to be out or just publish it?”

A crafty smirk filled Garak’s lips, “Whatever will have the biggest impact the quickest,” he requested simply. “ Take me to the hospital on your way back to the transport hub, will you? I need to see Julian for myself.”

Nodding, Jake offered Garak a reassuring smile as the two moved towards the City of Ilvia.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

The walk to the Ilvian Medical Complex was quiet, as Garak was too deep in thought to be able to communicate anything. Julian, his dear Julian, was pregnant with a half-Cardassian child and he was currently in hiding because Starfleet was trying to force him to terminate what _should_ be a joy.

“Legate Garak?”

Garak looked up from his thoughts to find that they had arrived, “It’s just _Garak_ , Jake,” he spoke in a slightly annoyed voice. “You may have the pleasure of addressing me casually, as a friend of mine.”

Jake nodded solemnly, “Make the biggest impact you can with your gift, please,” Garak said softly.

“I will,” Jake replied in a firm, determined tone. “I promise…I promise on my father.”

Jake left and Garak took a deep breath before going into the complex, eagerly anticipating the reunion.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

The main area was already busy despite it being early, Garak observed. He saw nobody available to direct him and the waiting area was full of people. Letting out an irritated sigh, Garak found a seat in the waiting area and sat with his suitcase between his legs to keep it from getting swiped. He got a few curious looks, but ignored them. Only a few moments passed before Garak began to lose patience.

Quickly spotting a computer, Garak grabbed his suitcase, got up, and casually sauntered over to the machine. He pressed a few buttons and was granted access to an inquiry screen.

“Computer, please tell me the room number for patient Julian Bashir,” Garak instructed quietly.

A noise filled the air, “ _Request denied_ ,” the computer replied. “ _Patient has requested no visitors at this time_.”

 _Blast you, Julian, and your need for privacy. I’m done being apart from you even if I have to break every protocol in existence just to see you and our child._ Garak thought irritably, “Computer, please tell me the room number for patient Julian Bashir,” he repeated firmly. “Override code Nine Two One Eight Black.”

“ _Override code accepted_ ,” the computer declared. “ _Listing patient’s location on screen_.”

Information immediately appeared on the screen, including step by step directions from the Intake Area to the designated hospital room. Grabbing a PADD from his pocket, Garak copied the room number and directions down before moving away from the screen with his suitcase firmly in hand.

_I’m coming, dear Julian. I’m coming and I’m never leaving you again. We’ll endure this together._


	6. Collision

It was a cool day, but the night had _not_ been kind to Julian.

Breakfast had been early and filling, but other than that, he had slept. _The Never-Ending Sacrifice_ novel was resting on his chest, having been barely read before he had become incapacitated by odd symptoms. In the night, he had developed chills and a fever and overwhelming exhaustion.

No further messages had been sent to him and he was perfectly fine with not having visitors. He needed to rest and to think and to cry and feel whatever he needed to feel by himself. The night nurse had mentioned that Jake Sisko had inquired about him, but Julian _hoped_ Jake didn’t actually come visit because he just wanted to be by himself. Jake visiting would bring a lot of unwanted attention.

The door suddenly slid open and Dr. Tyla came into the room holding a glass of cold juice in one hand and a cold compress wrapped in a towel in the other. She had heard from the night nurse that Julian’s health wasn’t good this morning and she was determined to help.

She went over to the bed and placed the compress on Bashir’s forehead. That action of course caused him to wake and look at her tiredly, “Morning,” she spoke gently. “This may help your fever.”

Julian sighed as Dr. Tyla gently placed the compress on his forehead, “ _Oh_ , that cold compress feels _so_ nice,” he spoke in a tired voice. “I feel like I’m on fire right now. Do you know if something’s wrong?”

“All my scans attribute it to your body changing due to the pregnancy it’s now hosting, so it’s _probably_ a hybrid pregnancy,” Dr. Tyla explained in a gentle, reassuring voice. “I also brought you some cold juice. Would you like some? It might help you feel a bit better.”

Julian nodded weakly and felt very grateful when Dr. Tyla helped him drink the juice, as he had no strength to hold the glass himself. As he finished the juice, the door suddenly slid open again. Dr. Tyla’s eyes widened in shock at the sight of Garak, as did Julian’s. _He knows_. Julian realized anxiously.

Garak, who was sporting the same outfit he always wore on Deep Space Nine except for a few emblems on his collar that indicated some sort of authority, eyed the two as he came into the hospital room with his bag. He was concerned and upset to see that Julian appeared so ill, but he was also relieved to see that someone was taking care of him.

The only surprising part was that the physician was Bajoran and she didn’t appear to have any qualms about caring for someone who was pregnant with a part-Cardassian child, as it was obvious that she was taking good care of Julian and he just seemed very sick and tired.

“Garak?” Julian finally managed to say weakly. “How… _how_ did you find me? I’ve been _hiding_ my presence here. I _blocked_ messages just so people would leave me alone…”

Despite the unexpected visitor whom she assumed was the baby’s other father, Dr. Tyla found herself amused, “ _How_ did you even find this room?” she asked kindly, smiling. “Patient information is strictly…”

For the first time ever, Garak suddenly looked official and unusually protective, “When it comes to matters of Cardassian safety and security, my old codes still work and as a Legate, I have the authority to step in when I _know_ that a Cardassian citizen is in danger,” he replied in an official voice.

Julian suddenly felt horrified. _Garak knew? Of course Garak knew_ , he reasoned. _That’s why he was here._

“Nerys told you?” Julian finally asked in an upset, confused once he had found his voice. “I made her _promise_ not to tell anyone about this.”

A familiar, very smug expression suddenly blossomed on Garak’s face and Julian immediately recognized it, “When I received the message from Doctor Tyla, I found it confusing enough that I reached out to a mutual friend of ours who just _happens_ to be a journalist,” Garak explained smugly, his grin infectious. “He’s _very_ good at research…”

“Jake,” Julian realized softly, sighing as he realized that his business was probably no longer private. “Garak, as _fun_ as this conversation is, I feel like I’m on fire and…”

Garak, however, didn’t look surprised, “Ah,” he replied calmly, a look of pure pleasure now forming on his face as he realized what that meant. “Our child _must_ be at least part Cardassian then, as Cardassian pregnancies involve the host body adjusting to the Cardassian environment…it is _quite_ hot there.”

Julian suddenly looked shocked; he hadn’t expected Garak to actually step up and take responsibility for his role in the baby’s creation. Garak seldom admitted his role in anything without an extraordinary level of dramatics, but was it actually possible that being a Legate had caused the Cardassian to mature?

“ _Our_ child?” Julian blurted out weakly, his expression anxious. “You’re not going to disown me as a _freak_ and leave me to it?”

Dr. Tyla’s eyes widened in surprise, but Garak simply shook his head and sighed, “My dear, I am _quite_ angry that the Federation preaches equality and tolerance while they are trying to force you to abort a child just because it’s part-Cardassian,” he explained in a solemn, unusually mature voice. “I am a Legate of Cardassia and I have _already_ exercised my authority to get the wheels of awareness rolling.”

Julian’s eyes narrowed, as he knew exactly what kind of dramatics Garak was capable of and wondered what laws had been broken in the process, “What _exactly_ did you do, Garak?” he asked in a faint, raspy voice that was overwhelmed by a weak yawn. “ _Oh_ , I’m so incredibly tired…”

Sighing patiently, Garak walked around the bed and planted himself on the stool beside the bed that physicians normally used. He set his suitcase on the floor just as Julian lost his fight with sleep and drifted off with his hands clenched in anxiety, outside of the warmth of the blanket.

“ _Rest_ , dear Julian,” Garak spoke softly, his expression tender as he gazed at Julian’s sleeping form.

Dr. Tyla began moving near the door, “Doctor?” Garak suddenly asked in a curious, almost pleading voice, causing Dr. Tyla to turn. “Doctor Tyla, can I know how my child is doing?

“When Doctor Bashir wakes and gives his permission, yes,” Dr. Tyla replied firmly, gently reminding Garak that as caring as he was, he was still an outsider to the situation until Julian himself chose to change that, “For now, Legate Garak, just do what you’ve been doing. Doctor Bashir seems to have accepted your presence here, so I’ll update his file so you’re listed as the only welcome visitor.”

Giving Garak a kind look, Dr. Tyla left to give the two privacy. Garak sighed and gently took hold of Julian’s hand. It looked so unseemly with a drip-feed in it, but the medicine was helping two people he cared very much about and so he couldn’t complain. What he could do, however, was gently massage it.

And so that is what Garak chose to do: administer a gentle massage in the palm to induce relaxation.


	7. The Power of Words

_He felt cold engulfing his thin back and he could hear a beeping sound nearby._

_“…Sterilize the area and cut on my mark. We have to get this Augment’s abnormality under control…”_

_A whirring sound suddenly filled the air and Julian felt pain coursing through his abdomen. He realized that someone was cutting him open, but it was too soon. The baby would die if he was cut open._

_It was then that Julian saw the flash of a Starfleet insignia hovering over him. They had him._

_“….No, please, don’t touch us! I don’t want to lose this baby!” Julian cried anxiously. “No!”_

A whimper filled the air and Garak, who had fished his personal PADD out of his suitcase to work while Julian rested, looked up. To his alarm, Julian was thrashing weakly in bed and crying his eyes out. He was asleep, but he looked absolutely terrified and was cradling his flat abdomen with a fierce intensity.

“Julian, wake up!” Garak spoke anxiously, his expression concerned as he stared at Julian helplessly, too afraid to touch him for fear that Julian would react negatively while trapped in his dream world. “You’re having a bad dream!”

A weak, anxious gasp filled the air as Julian suddenly woke and began looking around frantically, a confused expression on his face. After a few minutes, Julian’s gaze suddenly met Garak’s.

“I was on an operating table being cut open by Starfleet doctors and they were killing the baby,” Julian explained in a weak voice. “To them, it was too _different_ to be given a chance…because it was part-Cardassian.”

Stunned became the expression on Garak’s face, but he found himself without opportunity to offer any sort of reply because Dr. Tyla came in quickly. She stopped at seeing her patient crying and the Cardassian looking as if someone had hit him over the head with a mallet.

“The silent bio-alarm went off indicating patient distress,” Dr. Tyla finally spoke after several minutes.

Garak scoffed, his expression suddenly annoyed as he looked at the Bajoran doctor while Julian looked down at his blanket in embarrassment, “Oh, are you assuming _I_ caused it? It was the _Federation_ who caused it!” he replied in an upset voice, hating that Julian was embarrassed to be seen crying.

“ _Don’t_ lump me in with the Resistance fighters of the past, Legate Garak,” Dr. Tyla spoke in a firm tone that immediately warned Garak he was on thin ice. “I’m not so narrow-minded as to assume one is bent on causing harm simply because of who they are. I’m not the Federation and that Jake Sisko fellow is doing a _splendid_ job calling them out…”

The mention of Jake Sisko got Julian’s attention immediately, as he hadn’t known Jake was even on Bajor. He had last seen Jake on the station serving as a correspondent for post-war efforts and activities within the Alpha Quadrant; the young man had chosen to keep quarters there because it allowed him to stand daily watches at the wormhole in hopes that his father would someday return.

“Jake?” Julian finally asked, certain he hadn’t heard right. “Who exactly is he calling out?”

Dr. Tyla suddenly looked intrigued as she checked the monitors before looking at Julian, “It’s _all over_ the news,” she replied, having caught wind of it herself and having overheard both colleagues and patients discussing it throughout the hospital. “Have you not seen the news in the last few hours?”

“I’ve been _sleeping_ ,” Julian replied firmly before gazing at Garak, who was suddenly looking at his personal PADD with great interest. “Garak, do you know _anything_ about this?”

Garak, however, continued looking at his PADD and Dr. Tyla walked over to the newsfeed equipment because she could feel that Julian needed answers. She turned the newsfeed on, revealing a newsroom in another section of Bajor. A Bajoran reporter was sitting at a desk with an anxious looking Jake Sisko.

“ … _We just got word that another protest has started just outside of Starfleet Command in San Francisco, California on Earth in response to the article you published earlier today,”_ the reporter explained as he tapped a headpiece briefly before looking at the young man. _“Jake, what motivated you to write such a compelling piece about the Federation and indifference?”_

Julian’s eyes widened in shock as he found himself focused intently on the newsfeed, “ _Doctor Julian Bashir has been a family friend for a very long time and my father was his commanding officer on Deep Space Nine for seven years_ ,” Jake replied in a serious voice, his expression a mixture of seriousness, sadness, and anger _. Julian was given a lot of flak in recent years because the face his parents had him genetically engineered when he was a child became public and he’s currently suffering at the top of the glass elevator Starfleet imposed upon him. He’s a brilliant Lieutenant and he’s an even more brilliant doctor, but Starfleet chose to limit his potential simply because he’s different and they’re scared that he’ll turn dangerous because of those differences. They don’t see the good that he can do.”_

The reporter nodded, an intrigued expression on his face, “ _And you also penned this article for another reason, Jake,”_ he explained in an intrigued voice. _“What was it? Do you mind telling the viewers?”_

Jake gave a small nod, “ _According to my sources and research, Julian just recently discovered he was capable of becoming pregnant and he’s pregnant with a child fathered by Legate Elim Garak of Cardassia,”_ he spoke in a concerned voice _. “He informed Starfleet of the pregnancy and they outright told him to terminate it within 48 hours simply because it was too much of a security risk to allow a part-Cardassian child to exist. Elim Garak used to be a member of the Obsidian Order, yes, but he was also instrumental in helping the Dominion War to end. I find it rather idiotic that Starfleet would demand a child be killed just because they’re unique…”_

“ _So you wrote this to expose Starfleet’s hypocrisy?”_ the reporter replied, his face as eager as a child who had found a tasty treat or a much wanted toy during one of the holidays of giving.

Jake and the reporter continued to speak, but Julian wasn’t even listening anymore because the image of the newsroom had faded. In its place, a video of protesters gathering outside of Starfleet Command on Earth had appeared. There were hundreds of people in uniform and civilians gathering outside of the main building with signs bearing messages of support for himself, Garak, equality, love, and anti-bigotry. They were chanting, singing, holding hands, and some were even chucking tomatoes and eggs at the building. Security officers were blocking people from being able to enter, but they didn’t try to break things up. A headline suddenly ran under the scene. _This newest protest makes 17 in total with protests already in progress on Bajor, Qo’nos, Tellar Prime, Andoria, Delta IV, Betazed, Risa, Lunar Colony, Utopia Planitia, Asia, Australia, Africa, Europe, South America, and Canada. Rumor has it that protests are mobilizing across the United States, Alpha Centauri, Denobula, and even on Vulcan, but that is currently unconfirmed…._

Not wanting Julian upset, Dr. Tyla shut the newsfeed off and walked back over to the bed just in time to see him exhale anxiously, “Oh, _Gods_ …” he breathed softly, prompting Garak to look up. “I _should_ be angry that you, Nerys, and Jake violated my privacy and broadcast this information all over the galaxy…I _should_ be absolutely furious…but I’m _not._ This is reminding me of the unified sense of duty that exists in The Never-Ending Sacrifice…”

An expression of pure surprise filled Garak’s face at the mention of the book that Julian had once declared he hated, “Julian…you once told me you found that book _dull_ and _repetitive.”_ he replied softly.

A tired smirk appeared on Julian’s face, “I ordered it from the hospital library, and I’ve been re-reading it when I’ve been awake,” he confessed softly, pure tiredness in his voice. “Granted, I haven’t been awake very much since I’ve been here, but it keeps me occupied.”

“Speaking of being _awake_ , do you mind if I run a scan now that you are?” Dr. Tyla asked in a concerned voice, hating to interrupt the moment. “I’ve been coming and running them while you were sleeping, but you _did_ set off the alarm and I need to…”

A sigh escaped from Julian’s lips, “It’s protocol,” he replied before a worried expression crossed his face. “Do you think I could make a call to the city to move my shuttle? I left it on the outskirts filled with a few essentials and if I’m going to be here for a few days…”

“Computer, initiate diagnostic and ultrasound scans on patient,” Dr. Tyla spoke calmly before looking at her still very sick patient. “When it became clear you’d be here for a while, I arranged to have it moved to the medical centre’s shuttlebay. I am _not_ going to let you get out of bed to get your things because you're medically unstable, but I _can_ arrange for anything you need to be gotten from the shuttle and delivered here. It's a service available to patients.”

Julian exhaled before nodding, suddenly allowing himself to blush lightly and assume the expression of a nervous child asking for some affection, “Well, it's _silly_ , but I'd like someone to get Kukulaka for me,” he admitted in a quiet voice. “My teddy bear; he's on the shuttle. I'd also like my personal items.”

Quiet filled the room and Julian sighed, knowing it was time to fess up, “I didn't bring any clothes, as they don't matter, but I brought everything that has any importance to me,” he explained in an even softer voice, his expression said. “Once I was sure about being pregnant, I was _going_ to go on the run.”

Garak’s eyes widened, his expression one of pure shock. _Julian was going to go on the run as if he were a common fugitive even though pregnancy would make things difficult? The merely idea was absurd!_

Dr. Tyla looked equally concerned, but said nothing because she knew it wouldn’t help at the moment and would only distress her patient further. Garak, however, had no such reservation about speaking up.

“My _God_ , Julian; you're not a fugitive from the law just because you're expecting a part-Cardassian child!” Garak spoke in an upset voice, his expression both apologetic and furious. “This is a _blessing_ and I'm sorry if you've been made to feel like it's anything but!”

Dr. Tyla decided to turn her attention back to the console and found that although the scan was finished, her work obviously wasn’t. Julian’s hydration and oxygen were both still in the tank and she needed to act before she lost him, “The scan's done and your body temperature's still unstable, but the baby's doing _beautifully_ ,” she explained, pleased at the readings from the ultrasound scan.

Julian nodded, but didn’t speak because he was tired and worried, “Your hydration and oxygen levels, however, are still a bit off and so I want to keep pushing fluids and get you taking in more on your own,” Dr. Tyla continued, hating how worried he and Legate Garak now looked. “I also want to get you on a bit of oxygen support. I’m not sure, but it appears your body is redirecting its resources to protect the baby above all else.”

For the first time since his arrival, Garak looked calm and as if he could explain something, “It’s a Cardassian thing, Doctor Tyla,” he explained in a reassuring voice. “Expectant parents often experience the same thing and even despite the war, the medical system still prioritizes expectant parents above all else because they hold the future of Cardassia. We may have _lost_ people and cities, but we still have the future.”

Dr. Tyla nodded as she hooked a dripfeed to Bashir’s right arm and put a breathing tube in Bashir’s nose, being very gentle as she took to tucking it around his head and ears. To her, Bashir looked tired, emotionally drained, and concerned for the health of himself and his child. Fortunately for him, Garak was on the uptake and gently touched Julian’s hand, causing the doctor to look at him worriedly.

“No _wonder_ you want your teddy bear,” Garak replied softly, his expression filled with tenderness and compassion. “This whole situation is overwhelming you.”

Julian nodded, his energy fading quickly, “Yes, it is,” he replied softly. “But it’s also helped me come to a decision. One that I’ve been struggling to make ever since I came here….”

“A decision?” Garak asked, his expression both confused and concerned.

Julian nodded, “Computer, please access the resignation letter I dictated last night…” he began.

“You’re going to _resign_?” Garak replied incredulously, his eyes wide. “Julian, your talent will go to waste.”

Something between a yawn and a sigh escaped Julian’s lips, “I _can’t_ be part of an organization that forces me to exist within strict limitations just because I’m different and I’m not going to give up this child simply because they’re different either,” he replied softly, his eyes filled with the determination that he was simply too tired to show with his facial expression. “The Never-Ending Sacrifice made me realize how I myself have accepted whatever I’ve been told to accept simply because I thought there was nothing better. Now, with this baby, I _know_ there is.”

Dr. Tyla offered Julian a reassuring smile, as she could see he was getting tired and obviously needed it, “I’ll arrange for someone to bring you your things from your shuttle, Doctor Bashir,” she commented gently. “I’ll also arrange for Dietary Services to bring you more meals and fluids, all right?”

“Thank you,” Julian replied before yawning. “ _Oh_ , that oxygen support is putting me to sleep.”

Dr. Tyla responded by offering him an amused, but authoritative look, “Then _perhaps_ it’s best that you go to back to sleep for a while, Doctor Bashir,” she replied in a tone that dared him to disobey.

Offering another smile to both men, Dr. Tyla left to arrange delivery of her patient’s personal items to his room so he’d relax more. Instead of going to sleep immediately, however, Julian looked at Garak.

“ _Yes_ , I’m going to resign,” Julian affirmed softly. “I still have the skills of a doctor even if I don’t…”

The rest of his planned spiel suddenly died on his lips and Julian found himself going quiet as he noticed that Garak was again looking at his PADD with an expression of great intrigue on his face, “Garak, you’re _plotting_ something,” he realized softly. “ _Please_ tell me it’s at least _legal.”_

“My dear doctor, I would never do _anything_ illegal without consulting you first,” Garak replied in a mock scandalized tone, smirking at him. “I have been spending the last several hours communicating with Bajoran and Cardassian officials to ensure that you have a future and access to excellent medical care even if Starfleet won’t provide it to you.”

Julian frowned, still fighting the urge to sleep, “What _exactly_ have you been doing?” he asked softly.

“I’ve been arranging for Bajor to grant you entry into the Inter-Species Medical Exchange and Colonel Kira’s agreed to be your sponsor,” Garak replied, not bothering to mention that he had offered her a great deal in exchange for the favor. “I had to override the communication block you put on this room to get in touch with the station, but that was easy enough. As a Legate of Cardassia, I also have authority to bestow Cardassian citizenship on individuals I think who are worthy of my help _providing_ that they show their willingness to serve the state. You’ve _clearly_ shown that to me.”

Julian sighed, “Because I’m pregnant with your child?” he asked in a weak voice, clearly losing the battle with sleep as his vision began to blur. “Garak, won’t you get into trouble for abusing your power and authority to take on a Starfleet disgrace and illegal Augment? You’ve done a lot of work…”

“As if you were a _chore_ or a _duty_ , Julian,” Garak snipped. “Don’t be so _dense_. I care for you _deeply_ and I care for our unborn child too. (a beat) All that you’ve done to protect it and me shows you reciprocate…”

Julian yawned, “I do,” he replied before sighing weakly. “The oxygen’s helping, but it’s making me want to go back to _sleep.”_

The computer suddenly beeped, “Incoming message from Starfleet Command, San Francisco, Earth,” it reported. “Incoming message from Starfleet Command, San Francisco, Earth.”

“I just _want_ to close my eyes and sleep!” Julian whined irritably. “I don’t _want_ to read it!”

A temper tantrum was a clear sign that Julian was in need of sleep, Garak deduced and he decided to respond with enough patience and compassion that Julian would rest, “Then let me be your eyes,” he responded in a calming voice. “You close your eyes and sleep.”

Julian did so, but he wasn’t relaxed. Garak, meanwhile, got on the computer and his face fell as he read the message; Starfleet, ever a bunch of unforgiving bigots, had acknowledged the protests and had decided to discharge Julian from the service, “It isn’t good,” Garak spoke softly. “Starfleet’s decided to discharge you, Julian. You do, however, get to keep your medical license.”

A weak scoff filled the air, but Julian let his eyes stay closed, “A _fitting_ consequence for all the chaos I caused,” he replied in a sleepy voice. “I don’t feel angry about it.”

“Well, Cardassia will welcome _both_ of you and your talents with open arms,” Garak stated in a gentle, reassuring voice, smiling at Julian as he pushed the computer away. “That is, if you accept my offer to come there and live with me. We’ll make an _interesting_ family, Julian.”

Julian relaxed slightly, “That we will, _Elim_ ,” he replied sleepily. “Will you stay with me while I sleep?”

“Always and forever, my dear doctor,” Garak promised. “I’ll protect _all_ of us. We are a _family_ after all.”

Garak smirked as he took Julian’s hand and squeezed it ever so gently as Dr. Tyla returned with a box and Kukulaka in her hands. Julian didn’t open his eyes, however, as he had surrendered to sleep. Dr. Tyla set the box on the table and handed Kukulaka to Garak. Garak couldn’t help but smile at the creature before gently placing him on the chest of Julian’s hospital pajamas with a tender smile on his face.


	8. Clear Intentions

**Five Days Later**

**Ilvia, Bajor**

It was early, much too early for anyone to be up, but Julian was up and dressed. He was sitting on the hospital bed with his bag packed and his street clothes on. The nausea had eased considerably during the five days he had spent in the hospital, but he still tired out easily and had ‘warm flashes’ often.

Even though protests were still very much rocking Federation worlds, Julian knew he needed to go so that his doctor and Garak would have peace. Garak had hardly rested since arriving on Bajor and although Julian was grateful, he couldn’t help but feel like a burden. He needed to get up and _go_.

Instead of going, however, Julian remained seated on the bed because he honestly didn’t know where he was going to go. The idea of seeking Jake out and asking to stay until he figured things out seemed tempting, but he didn’t know where Jake lived. Nor did he know if any hostels were in the area. To call Colonel Kira for advice on what to do would attract Starfleet’s attention and _that_ might lead to trouble because it would make him look as if he couldn’t handle himself or the decisions he had made.

“Good morning, Doctor Bashir,” Dr. Tyla’s voice suddenly filled the air. “How are you…oh…”

Julian froze as Dr. Tyla came into view and gave him a once over whilst sporting a confused, concerned expression, “If you’re planning on running away, you won’t get very far with that dripfeed in your hand,” she spoke in a calm voice. “Besides, I think you ought to speak to the other father before you…”

“He must have _left_ ,” Julian replied in a subdued voice, sighing. “I just realized I woke up _alone_ …”

Dr. Tyla sighed, her expression softening as Julian yawned, “I thought about seeing if there’s some sort of hostel where I can rest and think about where to go,” he spoke sleepily. “I have parents on Earth, but we’ve never really gotten along and they’re probably _very_ upset about this…if they’ve heard about it.”

“Would you like some breakfast while you decide what to do?” Dr. Tyla asked softly. “I think you’re well enough to go to the canteen if I take you and light exercise will be good for you in your condition.”

Julian nodded meekly, sighing as he rose from the bed, “If I can get the pregnancy symptoms under control, I can go work as a doctor somewhere since I still have my license,” he explained in an anxious voice, allowing himself to be led from the room by the doctor. “Where’s a good place to practice?”

Dr. Tyla, however, didn’t say anything and instead marched Julian to the canteen. The canteen was quiet and so the two of them were able to quickly get trays of food and sit at a table near the door. Hunger quickly got the better of Julian and he quickly downed his meal, not even bothering to do it politely.

“I’m _sorry_ , I guess I was hungrier than I realized,” Julian spoke breathlessly. “I was being…”

Dr. Tyla smiled, calmly eating her breakfast, “Pregnant?” she replied gently. “Doctor Bashir…”

“Oh, _there_ you are,” Garak’s voice suddenly filled the air. “I _figured_ you’d be needing food…”

Julian looked up and was surprised to see Garak walk up to the table calmly, “I _thought_ you left?” he spoke in a quiet voice, his expression nervous. “I know you’ve been here for the last five days and…”

Garak looked surprised, “Yes, and I’ve enjoyed every minute of our time together,” he replied in a slightly amused voice. “As fun as it’s been here, we have to think of the future now and I got up early this morning to _arrange_ that future. Captain Yates-Sisko was nice enough to arrange passage for us to Cardassia on the Xhosa since Jake wants to go there anyway for news material. His story on you and our child has gained such attention that he wants to use his fame to bring attention to Cardassia’s needs.”

“I…what _use_ could I be on _Cardassia_?” Julian asked softly, frowning. “I’m _not sure_ if I’d fit in there.”

Garak scoffed, “We _need_ doctors and even though you’re pregnant, your medical skills would be a _great relief_ to everyone there,” he replied indignantly. “As the pregnancy progresses, we can make sure you’re not doing anything too dangerous or too burdensome. There’s also the matter of the enjoinment…”

“ _Enjoinment?_ ” Julian asked in a confused voice, not caring that he was interrupting.

Garak’s eyes narrowed, “Did you think our child was going to be born into a home with _unmarried parents_?” he asked in a confused voice, his expression shocked. “Cardassia is _very much_ about family…”

As Julian opened his mouth to respond, nausea suddenly overtook him and he found himself running from the room to throw up. He ended up puking all over the floor not far outside the room because he couldn’t hold it in long enough to find a proper bathroom. His mind was also reeling at Garak’s insistence that they go to Cardassia immediately, get _married_ , and make themselves a _proper_ family.

Trembling anxiously, Julian moved further down the hallway and went back to his assigned room. He loved Garak very much, which was why they were intimate, but he couldn’t imagine himself as being good enough to be part of a family when he himself came from one who didn’t see him as good enough.

Swallowing hard, Julian lay down and curled into a ball with his back to the door. He was tired, overwhelmed, shaky, and outright anxious enough that he needed to rest. He _needed_ to _rest_.

Footsteps filled the air, but Julian didn’t hear it because he allowed himself to drift back to sleep.

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

* * *

“…All the sickness is _natural_ ,” a gentle voice explained. “The anxiety, though, is _your fault_ …”

A sigh filled the air and Julian opened his eyes, frowning when he felt something warm covering his overtired body. He looked down and saw Kukulaka nestled in his arms and a blanket overtop them both.

Groaning weakly, Julian rolled and saw Garak standing beside the bed with Dr. Tyla, “I must have fallen asleep,” he mumbled in a groggy voice, sighing. “I’m sorry. I just got overwhelmed with all you were…”

“And your timeline was off,” Garak replied softly. “We were intimate before I went back to Cardassia to help end the war. It wasn’t the last time we were intimate, but you probably didn’t have symptoms…”

Julian’s eyes widened in surprise, as they had been intimate several times before Garak had left Deep Space Nine for good, but nobody had known about it except for Odo and Ezri. Odo had seen him leaving Garak’s quarters one morning and so Julian had confessed about the relationship, making Odo promise not to tell anyone about it because it would lead to trouble. Odo had chastised him about taking such chances during such uncertain times, but he had kept his mouth shut.

Ezri had been aware of the sexual relationship Julian had had with Garak, as he confided in her too, but she wasn’t overly bothered by it. She knew of Julian’s past and need for affirmation from multiple sources and they hadn’t become intimate until after Garak had left, so she was accepting of it.

Before fleeing Deep Space Nine, Julian had met with Ezri one last time with the intention of telling her about his pregnancy, but he had learned that she was going to be pursuing a command track post on another ship instead of remaining on the station. He had kept the news about his pregnancy to himself and had accepted her breaking up with him gracefully. Not long after that, he made plans to run, but Starfleet had contacted him first and had said they _knew_ about his indiscretions _and_ his pregnancy….

“…Doctor Bashir?”

Julian blinked and sighed, his focus now on Dr. Tyla and Garak, “As I was saying, you’re about two months along according to the scan I was shown when you gave your permission to let me see your records,” Garak explained calmly, his expression full of anticipation. “What did you think when you…?”

“I _didn’t_ read them,” Julian admitted softly, sighing heavily. “My mind’s been _elsewhere_ ….”

Dr. Tyla looked amused, “I’ve _noticed_ that,” she replied gently. “Anyway, yes, you’re about two months along and that’s in accordance with your symptoms and the scans I’ve run. I can give you the records.”

Julian nodded and slowly sat up, “So…Elim, you mentioned the Xhosa is coming?” he asked softly.

Garak nodded, “ _Quite soon_ , actually,” he replied calmly. “If you’re ready to leave…”

Dr. Tyla produced a datarod from her pocket, “Here are your medical records to pass along to the doctors on Cardassia,” she replied softly. “Might I suggest you read them? You really should.”

“Is there _counseling_ available?” Julian asked softly. “Can it be brought to Cardassia?”

Garak nodded, “I will ask around once we get there,” he promised. “Are you ready to go? Captain Yates-Sisko will meet us at the port and the shuttle you came in has already been loaded on board.”

“I am,” Julian replied in a quiet voice, sighing as he got up. “Thank you for your help, Doctor Tyla.”

Dr. Tyla nodded and smiled as Garak picked Julian’s bag up from the bed, “ _I_ will carry this,” Garak spoke in a firm voice, giving Julian a look. “ _You_ can carry your teddy bear and the data rod. The port’s not very far away, so I think we can walk there if you’re feeling up for it. Do you need anything from the station?”

“No,” Julian responded quietly, sighing. “Will…will I be _allowed_ to contact my parents from Cardassia?”

Garak gave him a look, “My dear doctor, you are becoming part of my _family_ ,” he replied in an indignant voice. “You are _not_ a prisoner and you will be allowed to do whatever you please on Cardassia once I get you established as my intended and the carrier of my child. The process won’t take very long.”

Nodding, Julian suddenly winced as Dr. Tyla removed the dripfeed from his hand and bandaged it, “You can’t leave with that in your hand,” she spoke in a kind voice. “Please be as careful as you can there…”

“I assure you, he _will_ be,” Garak spoke in a firm voice, nodding at the doctor as he took Julian’s arm.

Julian kept quiet during the walk to the port and sighed when he saw the Xhosa there, with Kasidy Yates-Sisko standing in front of it wearing a smile, “Kasidy,” he spoke in a warm voice. “How are you?”

“I’m all right,” Kasidy replied in a kind voice, offering him a smile. “How are you and the baby?”

Julian sighed softly, “I’m still trying to wrap my head around it,” he admitted softly. “It’s so… _surreal_.”

Kasidy nodded, “Well, I made a nice set of quarters for you and Garak on the Xhosa,” she replied in a patient voice. “I’ve also got a doctor on board who you can see if you or the baby need anything.”

Garak smirked, “And I will need to talk to you about maternity clothes during the ride,” he added.

“I’m _not_ anyone you need to go to _any_ trouble for,” Julian replied, nervously clutching his teddy bear to his chest before he walked away from Kasidy and Garak to the ship to board so he could have space.

Julian didn’t know his way around the ship, but he somehow ended up in what he assumed was the Mess or some sort of observation deck very quickly. He sat at a table near the window and silently stared up at the morning sky, his expression one of shame because he _was_ ashamed of who he was.

Suddenly, the ship began to move and Julian felt a brief sensation of motion sickness before it went away, “…It’s very good to see you again, my dear,” he heard Elim speak in the corridor. “How are you?”

Julian froze as Garak and a Human female dressed in a simple blue pantsuit and boots came into the room, “Ah, my dearest doctor, _there_ you are,” Garak spoke warmly. “I’d like you to meet an old friend of mine who also happens to be the Xhosa’s doctor. Doctor Julian Bashir, meet Doctor Mary Grayson.”

“Nice to meet you,” Julian replied softly, his expression nervous. “I just spent five days in the hospital…”

Dr. Grayson nodded calmly, her expression concerned, “You’re acting like you didn’t deserve the help you were given,” she observed in a kind, worried voice. “Elim was _very_ happy when he told us…”

“I’m a Carrier who was made that way because of illegal genetic engineering that I was put through as a child,” Julian replied nervously, sighing. “I was kicked out of Starfleet for refusing to get rid of this hybrid child and I’m wondering if I’ll even be a good father. I wasn’t that great of a son, a lover, or a friend…”

Garak scowled, “I can _see_ why you need a counselor,” he scoffed. “You’re _so very_ self-deprecating, but Starfleet probably let you get away with it because of your status. I, however, will _not_ put up with it.”

Julian looked down at the table, unsure of what to say because he wasn’t _used_ to receiving the affirmation he often craved. Dr. Grayson whispered something to Garak before leaving and Garak sighed gently, “My dear, would you like to see our quarters?” the Cardassian asked softly. “And perhaps rest?”

Swallowing hard, Julian looked up at Garak and nodded before standing up with his teddy in hand. Garak nodded and silently led Julian to their quarters in silence, feeling as if conversation wouldn’t be helpful.

Once they were in their assigned quarters, Julian immediately laid down in the bed because he was truly exhausted. The walk to the port had tired him out and he didn’t have the desire to socialize anyway.

“Is there anything you need?” Garak asked quietly, eyeing Julian’s resting form worriedly.

Julian looked thoughtful, “A cuddle?” he asked softly. “Everything has happened _so_ fast…”

Garak looked surprised, but joined Julian on the bed and gently wrapped his arms around Julian’s torso, sighing when he felt Julian relax. The warmth of Garak’s body immediately made Julian feel better physically and the younger man quickly drifted to sleep. Garak smiled at how cute Julian looked, but his smile quickly turned to concern when he suddenly felt Julian shiver.

Quiet whimpering filled the air as Julian’s eyes opened, “I’m _scared_ ,” he whimpered softly.

Garak sighed before getting up from the bed and going over to where their bags were. He rummaged through his bag briefly and came back over to the bed with a tablet in hand.

“Would it help you feel better if I read a Cardassian novel to you?” Garak asked softly as he settled himself back on the bed. “I _know_ all of this has been very overwhelming for you.”

Julian exhaled weakly, quickly rolling on to his back, “What if I don’t fit in?” he asked softly. “I mean, I’m pregnant with your child and going to a world that’s been torn apart by the war. The people on Deep Space Nine could barely tolerate my quirks at the best of times. I’m sure few will have patience for me and how I carry myself because so much has already happened…”

“You fit in with _me_ and that’s _enough_ for now,” Garak replied patiently. “I offer all that I have.”

Julian looked at him thoughtfully, “Why does that phrase sound _familiar_?” he asked softly.

“It’s the Declaration of Intent that serious couples learn and recite when they become enjoined,” Garak replied in a patient voice. “Cardassian wedding ceremonies are _quite_ lavish affairs, but I don’t expect that to be the case now. If you _want_ a lavish wedding, however…”

Julian shrugged, “I never really thought about it,” he admitted. “My parents had me turned into a Carrier in hopes that I would give them a grandchild, but they never thought I should actually get married because I’m socially awkward. If you really want to marry me, despite knowing…”

“I _do_ and I’m going to be contacting your parents once we get settled on Cardassia,” Garak spoke in a firm voice, his expression troubled. “For now, though, let’s enjoy this novel.”

Nodding, Julian cuddled against Garak and closed his eyes to rest as Garak began to read aloud.


End file.
